My Ramblings

Since September 17, I have been out of commission. I made four trips to the ER and ended up being admitted twice, once for five days all in the span of ten days. My Congestive Heart Failure (CHF) hit me hard; I was extremely dehydrated and anemic. After the five day stay, it appeared I was back on track but two days later I went back because something was very wrong. Turns out I was in Atrial Fibrillation (AF) which is an irregular heartbeat. Sometimes my heart was beating 140-150 beats per minute. I am now on a slew of new meds including Warfarin, a blood thinner to help prevent blood clots and a possible stroke. My cardiologist speculated that the AF could have been triggered by the stress caused by Daniel’s death and all that goes with it. I am as weak as a kitten, constantly tired and short of breath. There have been times this past few weeks where I have asked God to just take me home. I have felt like this before due to my son’s suicide but now it is amplified by how lousy I f